Self-Care versus Selfishness
Starting off the New Year can be exciting as we think of New Year’s Resolutions as “goals” that we want to achieve. It often involves self-care in some form and our intentions are good. Our intentions are good until something gets in the way and defeats our mindset about what we can and cannot accomplish. We are often stuck on what “it should look like” or “how we should be doing it” and often create a mental block that prevents us from moving forward. We then can turn something meant for good like Self-care into Selfishness and stop moving forward all together.
Remember what Self-Care is and it is not.
Self-care and selfishness may seem similar on the surface as they both involve prioritizing oneself, but they differ significantly in their intentions, impact on others, and overall approach to personal well-being.
Self-care:
Intent: Self-care involves taking deliberate actions to maintain or improve your physical, mental, and emotional health. It is rooted in the intention of nurturing yourself to be better equipped to handle life’s challenges, reduce stress, and enhance overall well-being.
Balance: Self-care promotes a healthy balance between taking care of yourself and fulfilling your responsibilities to others. It acknowledges that by caring for yourself, you become more capable of caring for others.
Healthy boundaries: Self-care includes setting healthy boundaries to protect your mental and emotional well-being. It involves saying no when necessary, prioritizing your needs without harming others, and recognizing your limits.
Selfishness:
Intent: Selfishness typically involves actions that prioritize one’s own needs and desires without considering the impact on others. It often stems from a focus on personal gain or benefit at the expense of others’; well-being.
Lack of consideration: Being selfish can involve disregarding or neglecting the needs and feelings of others, leading to potential harm or negative consequences for them. It often involves an imbalance where personal desires consistently override the needs of others.
No boundaries or excessive focus on oneself: Selfish behavior might involve an excessive focus on oneself without regard for how it affects others. It often disregards healthy boundaries and can lead to strained relationships and a lack of empathy.
In summary, self-care involves taking care of oneself with the intention of overall well-being and balance, while selfishness centers solely on one’s own desires without consideration for others. The key distinction lies in the intent, impact on others, and the presence or absence of healthy boundaries. Self-care can also look different based on your ideas, needs, time, goals, etc. The point, is self-care is an intentional step toward achieving wellness and can simply be done in 5 minutes 1 time a day. As you get more practiced, this can change or increase. So, give yourself grace as that is part of self-care.
